For appropriative constriction, the same remarks made for solipsistic constriction still hold, with only one difference: The AA of the abusive subject is negative (AA?), that is, s/he does not deem the subject s/he is tied-up to worthy of her/him, for some reason despising him/her or considering him/her as inferior [(M?+, F??), (F?+, M??)]. The subject who is constricted into the couple relationship is instrumentalized, as if being an object which can be appropriated, a commodity that is literally purchased, becoming a possession to be used for one’s own necessities, without any concern for the other. This type of couple shows unquestionably how dominance, not permitting an egalitarian manifestation of thoughts, sentiments, and personalities, makes the functioning of any TU-C simply impossible. Typical, in this sense, is the couple where the tied-up subject develops an obsessive fixation for the partner, localized in the RA, which is, however, accompanied by elements of devaluation and contempt, due to the negative orientation of the AA. In particular, such an obsessive fixation will assume a sexual dimension if the tied-up partner is female, with a devaluation of the partner’s capacities that may be the object of social appreciation, and to the contrary a fixation on attention/recognition if the tied-up partner is male, with a female devaluation mainly focused on her sexuality, desirability, and integrity. An example is that of the man that diminishes the partner by unfavorably comparing her to goods with a strong valence of identity recognition, and thus with a sexual implication in the case of the M-AA, such as, for instance, a luxury car that may more effectively and satisfactorily sanction the owner’s masculinity.
Moreover, we can observe that the diminished partner receives repeated frustration, which mainly aims at her/his RA (being the opposite sex partner AA the one that drives the attack), so that the absence of the TU, in the partner that presents a negative concordance, is consequently inevitable.
The last form of constriction on a subject with a negative concordance is the opportunistic one, which characterizes an AA+ in the absence of a TU ((F+?, M??), (M+?, F??)). There is no bond on either side, but one of the partners has some personal advantage from being in the couple. Within the matrix, the cell of the opportunistic constriction sits in the row or column of exploitation (AA+, RA?), so that we can regard opportunism as a form of exploitation that in this case is declared and not concealed, that is, there is not even the need to pretend to be tied-up. This is because pretending the existence of a bond would not generate any additional benefit given that the other is in turn not tied-up and has no interest in being so. An example in this regard is a ilies to the benefit of the families themselves, reflecting the will of a single partner.
The antithesis of a couple with a cooperative tie-up is the forced couple, at the opposite side of the matrix’s main diagonal, with a negative concordance of all areas (F??, M??). The couple is forced because none of the partners have any kind of interest in the other, so that the couple could not spontaneously exist. A typical example is that of the marriage of reparation, when honor and thus social conformity, not only of a single subject but of the entire family of origin, is put at stake by the birth of an out-of-wedlock child, lacking the legitimization of the community.
The forced couple provides an extreme demonstration of the concrete possibility of a mating independently of the presence of a functioning TU-C, and of how the formation of the couple needs salience and ties of some nature, besthookupwebsites.org local hookup Regina Canada be them spontaneous, simulated, or imposed. However, its actual durability requires that, if the couple is based upon instrumental benefits or constriction, such convenience or constriction may effectively persist in time. The alternative possibility is the TU-C, where a well-fed flow of rewards can function as a real engine of psycho-relational and affective growth for the couple in the absence of any need of external constraint.